_!!!the pillar diary (1) main (1) 1!! 2 3 1 3 1! 2 1 1 2 1 1

###### ^ <div style=" background-color: rgba(235, 234, 230, 0.8); padding: 10px; border-radius: 0 px; font-family: monospace; border-left: 0px solid #3498db; margin-bottom: 20px; font-size: 0.8em;"> project: <a href="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies/thepillar" title="Watch and listen to my part for The Pillar">S A S H A</a> by: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/pterodactyl.supplies/" title="Instagram">pterodactyl.supplies</a>/<a href="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies" title="website">pterodactyl.supplies</a> Mother Pillar: <a href="https://thepillar.method.education/" title="collective project">The Pillar</a> Mentor: <a href="https://mishkatz.com/" title="website">Misha Katz</a>/<a href="https://www.instagram.com/mish.katz/" title="instagram">Misha Katz</a> note: The events surrounding "The Pillar" resist conventional explanation. What initially presented as a standard project or study course quickly unraveled into something far more complex—perhaps even extraterrestrial in its nature. My role within this operation remains unclear, much like the operation itself. The guidance of Misha Katz, a mentor whose methods and insights appear to draw from sources unknown to us, only deepened the mystery. I emerged from "The Pillar" irrevocably changed—my thoughts more fragmented, yet strangely, more focused. The line between the investigation and investigator blurred, leaving me to question not just what "The Pillar" was, but why I was drawn to it. The truth is out there, but whether I’ve glimpsed it or merely brushed against its shadow remains to be seen. created: 2024-07-15 updated: 2024-08-29 18:53:00 status: ongoing classification: confidential words: 11639 "very": 27 images: 33 permalink: thepillardiary tags: #thepillar #petlizardinstagramaccount #houdini #c4d #redshift </div> *As this case study was written and prepared I faced the variety of technical issues, not seeing the forest behind the trees, I got caught up in those little cute technicalities unable to resolve some of them or give up or give in. There is this weird joy of doing something this unproductive and insignificant. However I am still going to present you this case study, which hopefully will be updated in a proper manner and filled with something that really matters. So may you visit me again and you might discover something new. I'm endlessly grateful to [Misha Katz](https://www.instagram.com/mish.katz/) for the whole experience which I'm unable to even comprehend just yet. And to my friends I was so lucky to meet you all. Thank you for your attention.* <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [08-Dec-23 00:16] I was recently asked where to study motion, and I said, well, there was the Method... In general, it seems to me that non-living courses in unreal time are May 31, 2024 - I often get stuck inside a lot of slightly different options, sketches, and tests, and I can’t seem to move on. Difficult I need help. </div> ###### 1. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">July 18. Yesterday I thought it was the Tower of Babel, although it doesn't feel like that. I like to think that there was a strong wind and everyone got wound up, but it doesn't feel like that either. I think everyone was looking for somewhere to wind up. I was looking for a place to hide, as if that's how it should be. I pretended to be something that could be in this environment. I think this is an <abbr title="06 aug - I endlessly rejoice">inn</abbr> between nowhere and nowhere. Now I want to do a shot with a hurricane and a shot with rain. July 30th. Still like this choice. ___ Sshhh, [23-Jun-24 17:39] Mom irrigator Sshhh, [24-Jun-24 22:31] Hello! ▇ ▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ (▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ (▇▇▇▇▇), ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇), ▇▇▇▇▇-▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇! ❤️ Sshhh, [24-Jun-24 22:47] 22:20 No catch, the bait’s sunk, and Sasha’s covered in algae. Just not my day today. F11 Misha Katz, [25-Jun-24 18:43] Hi! There is the first exercise. ....... Sshhh, [26-Jun-24 00:20] Hello! At first I had some trouble interpreting the question ......... Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 15:05] I wanted to say what I think about this: ...................... Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 15:05] Oh my God, so many words) (July 30 - counted 271 words)</div> ###### 2. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"><s>I think I'm confused.</s> (August 6 - I don't think so anymore) <s>I think I'm confused.</s> I kind of like it, I get pleasure from drowning, and I want to pass it on. It gives me strength and joy. I like watching strangers quarrel. I feel cornered, but I don't think I'm an evil person. It's probably hard to untangle yourself if you like the tangled mess. Now I want to make a shot with a straightened out knot. I like tediousness. (August 6 - this paragraph was rewritten ? times) I think I like redundancy. But not thick. Monotony, filling, filling. Irritation, not suffering. I wouldn't want to <s>upset</s> anyone. Bewilderment, confusion. I need to remember to make animation. ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇?</div> ###### 3. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">It was decided before the project was announced. There’s a time loop going on. I thought long and hard that I really needed this, specifically from Misha. I think since last fall or winter for sure. But I was too shy to ask, I just kept thinking away. When it was announced, I <s>stared</s>, when the questionnaire appeared, I immediately started filling it out, but it almost destroyed me. I went through a dozen rounds of answering questions for myself, it was interesting, difficult, painful. Part of the difficulty was interpreting the questions, and part of it was probably hard to be honest. It's hard to untangle what means what, what relates to what, what doesn't relate to what, what is connected to what, what is not connected to what. Because everything is connected to everything. The last few months have been hard with interpreting incoming messages.</div> ###### 2a. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. An early memory, like a ball, like a drawn ball, like a shading ball, humming, approaching me, it is being shaded closer and closer. I am lying in bed, still in my first apartment, I am probably three years old, this is not a dream, not visual,it's like a spasm[^1], a sensation that is visualized. It's not scary, but it's unclear and impossible to explain. A recurring memory. They asked me what was hard about studying. I hate watching videos. I hate videos. But I like it when things move. And I love movies. A still from a movie. ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. .....................................</div> ###### 4. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">This is probably about the second questionnaire. I'm getting hung up on the lack of data, mostly perceiving it as a problem with my equipment. Enthusiasm, confusion and vacuum. Difficulty with interpretation. I had to have an internal conversation to understand the essence of the questions. I had to ask chatgpt how feelings differ from emotions, I kind of know, but this knowledge is not reinforced. I mainly use chatgpt to find out what is understood by something in general. I fill it out slowly, without resistance, with interest, and with surprise that there is nothing inside. They ask about their feelings and emotions. I have appropriated sensations, sensations, but not feelings. This helplessness, when you do not understand what you are being asked about, or you do not have an answer. How can this not be. Now, after a few weeks, there are feelings too. All sorts of bad things can also be ▇▇▇. I am happy and puffed up. August 5, 24 - now we will set the year. This project has really spun me up, and nothing bad seems to be happening. A little less scared and a little more. Not living is scary, something else is scary. You also get tired. By the way, there was a habit of identifying myself through not, here it did not work very well, and why by the way. (will need to run everything through spell check) June 27 "This is the beginning of the work on the project. It concerns those who have sorted out the questionnaire (▇▇▇▇▇://▇▇▇▇▇.▇▇▇/▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇9▇▇6). In theory, it should concern everyone. So please click the link." I click, click. Fear fear fer The most difficult question about the motto. Why the motto it’s really life principles. Well, it's entirely impossible, but I'll try. Actually, I have a principle that I grew with my own hands: if you don't know what to do, don't do it. I don't know why I didn't write it, probably because of that. It seemed like they weren't asking about that. Abstinence. Removed all references to intonation. I don't remember why. I'm trying to get to the assigned emotions through childhood, as recommended - there's mostly the delight of vision, the sun, memories, how you look at something. That's why vision was put in the main line, I think that's wrong. (August 6 - I'm annoyed by this psychologized language here) They ask what you want to be remembered for, radically exclude all references to ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. For example, I like long-winded movies. They ask what you want to do - my eyes or me. Of course my eyes, that's me. It seems that it was just a lie. (05 August 24 - this is such a constant threshold, by the way, that I would like to see and hear better) This time I decided that I would listen to my eyes, let what I see be transmitted. It didn't work out, I think. - 3 tomatoes - ½ onion - 100 ml milk - 100 ml 10% cream - 1 tbsp flour - 2 tbsp butter - Salt to taste - Ground black pepper to taste On July 18, I talked to Misha about how I need to make a case. Well, if I do it this way, then yes. Misha says I need to model things so that there are things. I'm not sure. But I confuse the feeling of the path with laziness and exhaustion.</div> ###### THERE'S A HOLE HERE ###### 4a. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">In one of the questions I encounter an ideologically important one, I think it's important, I don't believe in outside politics. In general, not everything that doesn't suit you necessarily doesn't suit you. If I think it's important, then it will suit you. ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇-▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇'▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. Well, I'm actually having fun with find and replace here, it's hard to resist. (August 5 - I would actually like it to be green instead of orange, but for now it's orange)</div> ###### A1 <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">There are some lost thoughts - >July 8 - Revolution in New York I was in some kind of heavy or turbid state, or cruel, aggressive, I don't remember, I thought that the pole needed to be destroyed, sawed up. I don't remember the details. I remember the state of the revolution itself, the boring ideal state of the script. July 25 - >"Here the action suddenly resumes without warning, and it's the same scene again, which unfolds rapidly, always similar to itself." You can (you can't)[^2] use this project as a reassembly - identify with it, and then leave it. >"Most of the other things have already been mentioned. Let us mention them again: a white car without wheels, an iron cage for transporting wild animals in the subway, a bicycle, several archaic agricultural machines, namely a chaff cutter, a single-share plough and three wooden harrows with iron tips, two bright blue doors, still enclosed in their door frames and turning on their hinges, and finally a metal ladder placed vertically in one corner of the area and constituting a kind of observatory from which one can simultaneously observe both the space enclosed by the fence and the surrounding streets. At the top of the ladder is a television antenna connected to numerous devices scattered over the cobblestones (each of them occupies six squares) showing the same educational programme, which makes it possible to follow it along the entire route. One of these televisions, broadcasting an educational programme about black Africa, figured, as we have seen, in the description of the first act of torture. Finally, we note that in the more open areas of the stage there are such objects as a ten-liter can full of gasoline, a bundle of chains of the thickness used to tie up very large dogs, four cast weights weighing twenty kilograms each, with a large ring and a raised inscription certifying the exact value of their mass, nippers, a hammer, blacksmith's nails, a thick wooden grater of a cylindrical shape with very large holes, a green silk dress burned by an iron, two syringes for intravenous infusions, three medical gowns stained with blood, steel scissors, an iron ruler with sharp edges, a box with six bottles containing a bright red liquid, tweezers for removing hair, a notebook in a black moleskin cover, a felt-tip pen, twelve razor blades, a knitting needle, pins, etc." June 27 Today at 18:00 CET, a short meeting. On record. ..... Spoiler: today's task will be with thumbnailing. This is the beginning of the work on the project. This concerns those who have sorted out the questionnaire ((▇▇▇▇▇://▇▇▇▇▇.▇▇▇/▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇9▇▇6). In theory, this should concern everyone. So please click the link. >Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 15:19] I'm thinking about the questionnaire. I could have thought about it for quite a long time (very much), and now I'm still thinking that I need (or should I) use this exercise to force my thoughtfulness as one of my fundamental qualities to be suppressed. I restrained myself, <abbr title="message">didn't send it.</abbr> I'm sending, <abbr title="questionnaire">that </abbr>, a minute before the stream. Not happy, I wrote something untrue. July 25 - rereading, I wrote something untrue, there's a lot missing, and what kind of words are these. I wanted to look ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, and to look like I understood the question. A normal desire. Okay, I removed some. But I needed more shame, of course.</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-100.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">(I would never have chosen number 100 if I had a choice) On July 1, I was discussing with a psychoanalyst my misunderstanding of the questionnaire........ Did he say that it should be like that? A memory lapse, okay. A few days later, I began to feel the fullness that I had been missing for several months or years, with feelings, emotions. All sorts of <bad> ones too. It's nice to live like this, thank you.</div> ###### NOT THAT <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">It's easier to use all sorts of <bad> stuff. Well, not the worst stuff. I thought for a long time that the most unifying thing is stylistic perception. I still think so. I need to ask Misha about his compromises. Compromised. I'm rereading the questionnaire, well, yes, I didn't get the intonation right. Totally wrong, not quite right. pride, dignity, hubris and false pride <▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇></div> ###### 5. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I went to take pictures, I like everything. I remembered that I had taken pictures of the poles before. I remembered that I liked the excess, but what I found was not as excessive as I remembered. Maybe I didn't find it. (05 August 24 - no, that's not it, that's not how it all started)[^3]</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-69.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">>Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 17:51] I'm thinking that I can't add this to the case. It would be like I didn't do anything at all I went to take pictures, I like everything. I went to take pictures, I took a notebook and markers. It was never possible <to> find a pencil or something to write with in the house when I needed it. I think I like that they are thick, although at some point it will get in the way. I also like to overlap words.</div> ![[giphy.gif]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I went to take pictures, I like everything. The first few meters (half an hour?) are very hard to move away from home, I like everything, it's impossible to stop. (Then in the photo - nothing special. But good luck.) </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005 1.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">For some reason I got it into my head that I need details, elements, and not a general idea, it's hard to change, but I'll try. (July 30 - I don't remember now whether we tried, but I thought we tried) You think that you need to try not to control, but to perceive, but you don't control anything anyway. Okay, not nothing.</div> ###### c.lf 'crbps xnj kb needed?' do I need to add some sketches here? <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Loituma John Stewart. It turns out that his text is not the main one, but how, others can't do it. I thought that Oliver is not so funny, but he is funny. (05 August - count the use of the word "very")[^5] I miss the way to work, I miss airports, there is almost no space left when you are nowhere. I like to wash dishes. </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-101.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I see a good reason to do a case study of a project as a project. And all sorts of rational reasons. But why... Do people do this because they want to?</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-72 1.png]] >Sshhh, [03-Jul-24 16:08] I wanted to tell you how it's going. I go to take pictures and get excited, I can't stop, but as it turns out, I'm worried about the lack of reasons for details. I can't stop thinking about the main pole itself, everything changes depending on different ideas about what it is. I sit down to draw, but I don't draw what I just looked at. It's hard for me to think about the detail, instead I think about the pole itself or the frame again. It seemed to me that the task was the supposed details of the project, but I still think about the whole piece. I go to the photos and try to switch to the details. Then I see that what I drew was actually there. In general, it seems to me that something is hatching, maybe not what is needed, but it is hatching. I don't know where the idea that a technical drawing of the details was stuck in my head, maybe from the mention of plasticity or examples. It seems that I have several options that I would like to do, which I like, perhaps prematurely. ###### and some sketches here? <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">This project, calling for orderliness, since it exists at all, will turn out to be the most disordered nonentity. Well, I just liked the word nonentity. I didn't even think about insignificance at all.</div> ###### what’s this here? <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Misha says that the text is more important than the picture, or is that how I hear it, I can't agree,(August 6 - today I don't agree at all) </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-102.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"> In the picture we see the opposition of text and a picture. When a psychoanalyst, going through a circle (July 30 - what other circle? - editor's note) returns to mentioning branching, I repeatedly feel offended and ashamed instead of proud. Basically, it seems that you need to gain weight. Either the weight of text or weight of a spot. I would like to make a twist-tie instead of text, but I need to try not to eat dessert in the middle of the road someday. And then, it most likely won't work anyway. No, it will work. Mom said that life is a fight with entropy, mom also said that it doesn’t really matter. To Dad ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ "▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇". Dad loves what he does. And dad doesn't get hung up on it. What do you want? The Bridge of San Luis Rey</div> ###### is this in the right place? <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I need to make a twist-tie. How much will I give for this, 8 hours? 12? 6? Start with 4. (this is some time before July 27)[^4]</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-65.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"> (July 30 I calculated - July 26 1h45m + July 27 5h14m, a clear result in about 3-4 hours, a good fast result, plus another 8 hours or more for unclear twisting, very long and in vain by the feeling, as usual) </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-115.png]] ###### MORE HERE <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [06-Aug-24 05:42] I made a procedural wire knot, I made an asset out of it. More precisely 10 (check) asset options. In one of the options, we find the two closest points and tie the wire to them, taking into account the distance and thickness of the supposed wires. In another option, we find pairs of the closest points in some acceptable maximum. In the third option, we simply put it on each point separately, not so exciting, but also suitable. I ended up using this option, I think. Fig. 1. I think I'm going to do the dishes. I'm looking in my notes for mass for the sake of mass - I found a bit of detail, as well as a bit of conventionality ego death does not seem an attractive state, why do you need to kill the ego. screw it on somehow maybe And also push (here is an illustration)</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-66 2.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Well, let there be text without pictures at all in the end <s>meaningless</s> really. Let there be several variants of the case, when you click on the link, you get to a random variant. Or to an excerpt. You can click a bunch of times to read it to the end, or spit right away. Spitting right away is a good option. A game of hopscotch. I want them to be given. Surrendered. We will not entertain you here. We will entertain you, that is, if it entertains you. That is, ourselves. ▇▇▇▇▇ do we need some or what. ▇▇▇▇▇. All references to ▇▇▇▇▇ have been radically removed. Consistently. Or let the illustrations be on a separate page and you would have to go back and forth and check. I take care of myself, I sleep and eat, I like to wash dishes. I don't like watching videos, but I like movies. I was scared, what if I don't like ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ anymore. Well, I like the one that's impossible to watch. (well, yeah, I don't like it that much) When my parents weren't home, I got the cassettes out from under the VCR, put on Last Tango in Paris, and decided not to watch it. I didn't even put on Satyricon, I never liked historical movies.</div> ###### 6. <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I write with whatever I have at hand, but I like to write in different colors and have everything layered, I wanted to make a project out of this someday. I shove red everywhere. By the way, I need to shove it in.[^6] Fig. 46 A suitable option is always located a little beyond the boundaries of time. Not a little, but a lot. The greatest interaction was achieved in examining the pillar. (July 30 - the universal pillar) Yggdrasil I am glad that he decided to leave his pillar in black and white. Maybe it is temporary, of course. time in amsterdam scene-work-010_011!!!-007 upload statistics, so many versions, so many minutes</div> ###### There should probably be some screen recordings here <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">I usually can't stop Stumbling I thought that I really don't like switching between tasks, I hate it when I have more than one task in my field, I get overloaded and get stuck. In fact, when you do something tightly and for a long time, you have to switch, if you can. (06 August - Have to, in the sense that you switch organically and gently) If you haven't been sucked into panic or struggle. Well, he can't go around naked, he's already an adult.This is a quote, but not a citation Once, at a Hebrew course, I met a psychiatrist, we went for coffee, she was telling me about her life, she said "I don't work with neurotic people, they don't have real problems." I was offended. ---- 30 Jul 21:06 2925 words 2928 characters Sshhh, [04-Jul-24 22:13] Yes, I clearly noticed that I am pulled towards organic things, towards machines and screws not so much (now), that is, they can be a part of the composition, but not as the main thing, probably. On the other hand, it is probably organic things that disguise themselves as inorganics (not sure yet to what extent)</div> ###### or sketches or something <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">4 July - The the thing that draws me in the most so far is a poster idea, like an almost dark spot filling almost all the space, ...............................................</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-106.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 21:57] Thanks! And what were the two solutions? When I think about the technical side, it begins to seem that this may threaten motion designer cliches. But this makes me want to do it even more, because I don’t imagine it as a cliche. (maybe in vain?). On the one hand, it could be a setup like a procedural task (I like to dig down, but I’m afraid to get trapped in it forever), on the other hand, it could be a complete fake and very dirty in general, including intersections and all sorts of garbage, and this will fall into the main idea of such an obsessive scribbling of the infinite. Maybe even almost 2D or wireframe in general. Maybe try particles. At this point, it’s probably worth starting already and seeing what the resistance of the material will give, but this path is ineffective, perhaps I always fall for this, I wonder if I can choose some other path? I’m also thinking about where these paths come from, in my opinion they should grow directly from the pole, I don’t know, just from the inside or directly from its surface.</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-005-113.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Almost stole Tanya's mouth Sshhh, [13-Jul-24 13:56] I wanted to write again about what was happening to me. I started wrapping it, I realized that it was technically possible in several ways, which most likely need to be combined. I ran into a very big issue of scale. Then the computer broke and took a long time to be repaired, and I found myself thrown back to the stage of sketching, watching videos and thinking. Which on the one hand is very nice, on the other hand, it is unclear how all this will turn out now. Well, at first I took a walk and looked around and drew. The most important thing was that I am not at home, not in front of the computer, I need to write more about it there. </div> ###### Do I really need to write more about it there? <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">And then I worked a little and my computer broke. A few things have made me so happy in recent weeks. Too much work and it's like you're choking yourself all the time. No computer - no problem. (August 6 - well, not really too much work, I just do everything slowly[^7]) I don't think a neural network can handle what humans can handle. On a previous project, I fell into euphoria from washing dishes. After a few days, though, it let up. (August 6 - well, I wasn't happy about not being stuck, I was just happy about my existence) Well, when the computer came back, I was finally ready to continue. Then there's a memory lapse, maybe I'll fill it in later. (August 6 - is it really a failure?)need to reboot, it's slowha </div> ###### you are here - August 6 ![[misha-005.gif]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [15-Jul-24 14:33] I think it's going somewhere. The intonation is about right. But everything went beyond the limits, it needs to be stuffed back. And there's still a lot of work, I'm <s>panicking.</s> I am worried.</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-79.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [26-Jun-24 13:15] Interest, surprise, bewilderment. Sshhh, [26-Jun-24 13:17] Envy Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 10:22] 1. ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇. ▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇-▇▇, ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇, ▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇. 2. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇/▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇/▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. And I think that (August 6 is a completely honest cleansing - I don't even remember what was written there) Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 11:56] Anger, nostalgia, tenderness, delight. Doubt. Contradiction Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 12:27] Lord, so many words :) 06 August 18:02 - 9506 words Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 12:28] Not two chairs, but a synthesis. Sshhh, [27-Jun-24 12:39] Righteous anger Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 15:26] problem with realism Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 15:26] photorealism Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 15:26] fixing the process scratches Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 15:27] proportions Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 15:27] priorities - work, rigmarole Sshhh, [01-Jul-24 19:06] Get a treasure chest by fighting exactly five bosses ✓ </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-033.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [04-Jul-24 10:41] Slow down (August 6 - and what to slow down by the way. I wonder) Sshhh, [04-Jul-24 10:45] Head ▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [07-Jul-24 19:32] I am inside this summer camp (by the way, I have never been to an ordinary one) twisted into a spiral and I am somewhere between my favorite non-existence and eating cake (also beloved). Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 08:28] Project for A Revolution in New York Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 12:45] I love the meaningless. Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 16:07] Fort Boyard Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 16:08] Labyrinth Sshhh, [08-Jul-24 18:29] viewport Sshhh, [09-Jul-24 11:13] I'm doing everything slowly [^7] [^8] - <a href="https://vimeo.com/981181394/cb9d40ca91">process #26_2</a> Sshhh, [09-Jul-24 22:32] Hello, Vadim Gennadievich, I'm sending you the data that I currently have: ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇, ▇▇ +▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇.▇▇.▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ - ▇▇.▇▇.▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ - ▇▇▇-▇▇▇-▇▇▇ ▇▇</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-118.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"> Sshhh, [10-Jul-24 02:03] add thumbnail image Sshhh, [12-Jul-24 15:28] Tumanyan </div> ![[sketches-006a.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [15-Jul-24 14:28] I think it's going somewhere. The intonation is about right. But everything has gone beyond the limits, it needs to be stuffed back. And there's still a lot of work to do, I'm panicking. more Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:25] Hit my head Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:26] Cat fell off the table Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:30] Squigglevision Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:31] ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:31] Colin farrel</div> ![[Project essay diary (1) main (1) 1!! 2.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:45] It seems that some ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ work better than others on large ones, right in very close approximation (05 August - robots) Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:54] Diane, remind me not to forget my phone Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:58] I hit my head again, my head is spinning and I feel sick Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:59] Excel charts fitbit Exist ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 01:59] Project on Exist Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:08] Mr. Bean, I never liked Mr. Bean Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:09] It's hard to write text because you have to remove yourself from it Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:09] No need for self-admiration Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:09] You need to admire Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:10] It goes from point to point, then back, then it continue Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:11] I need to make an asset</div> ###### and apparently, there’s a screen recording here too <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:11] Just can't get enough Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:13] My grandmother kept a diary Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:14] I always wanted to keep a diary, but I couldn't - I was afraid that someone would read it. And it didn't consist of events, but of ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:14] Well, not always, in childhood. Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:16] I’m doing everything slowly - process #26_11 [^7]</div> <div style="padding:56.25% 0 0 0;position:relative ;"><iframe src="https://player.vimeo.com/video/981181394?h=cb9d40ca91&badge=0&autopause=0&player_id=0&app_id=58479" frameborder="0" allow=" autoplay; picture-in-picture; clipboard-write" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;" title="process-026_2"></iframe></div><script src="https://player.vimeo.com/api/player.js"></script> <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 02:17] Well, I was just in an office of sorts Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 12:23] Hypothesis - ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ August 4 - here these damn blocks take up much more space than the letters</div> ![[Project Essay Diary (1) main (1) 1!! 2-1.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 12:24] Role Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 12:24] Hypothesis - theses Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 12:56] Write to Misha > “There are figures!” cried Lady Helen. “Look, gentlemen! Look!” >“Let us do everything in order,” said Lord Glenarvan, “and begin again. Let me restore one by one all these incomplete, fragmentary words.” . >Misha Katz, [25-Jul-24 17:11] You only need to look at the principle of action from Raphael. Sshhh, [25-Jul-24 17:50] I'm thinking that this shouldn't be added to the case. How could it be that I didn't do anything at all? </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-028 1.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 02:09] Milk comes from a cow Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 19:23] ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ like a study Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 19:23] Playing hopscotch Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 19:24] Playing on ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ ▇ Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:02] I was somewhere outside ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ and ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ about work or something Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:03] I'm really angry Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:12] I'm not KafkaAugust 5 - is that a quote or what? Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:12] >"Prompt is not a process" (By the way, when I first used Midjourney, I was impressed by how identical it was to my usual work process - iteration iteration iteration adjustment hypothesis iteration) (Although, well, yes, if something quacks like my process, it's probably my process) (But I quickly got sick of it) Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:37] I forgot. I didn't have time to write it down Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:37] I got a flat tire while driving through mud out in the woods Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:51] I don't want to do a simulation, I just don't want to. No, I don't want to at all, I don't want to do a simulation </div> ###### and now you are here <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:52] Point between, on the center of the ball larger radius, on the ball four points, sort, connect, smooth add a twist Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:52] Twist on the last points Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:54] Saved messages Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:55] Just re-evaluated our penultimate conversation. Measurement: delay - 8 days. Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:56] Or a horseshoe between two points with a twist near the second. Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:58] The tire was fixed Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:58] My mind is cleared Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:58] Pizza for dinner but we just ran out of sun-dried tomatoes</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-123.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:59] There were doubts about the need for a plot Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:59] Just don't need Proust Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 20:59] Twilight zone, because twisty Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:02] Line line fuse line line mirror fuseline line mirror fuse Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:02] Faulkner Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:04] Text in italics in the book edition is enclosed in curly {} brackets.(05 Aug - is this a quote?) Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:04] Now we're going to have a big game Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:09] 1 Sshhh, [26-Jul-24 21:09] Butt dial Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 01:36] When I write the process, I become a little more economical Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 01:36] By numbers Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 01:43] Saturdays are red paint days Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 03:08] Let's talk about the face ▇▇▇▇▇▇, about the photo Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 04:23] part ▇▇▇▇▇▇ - do everything easily Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 12:41] For example, I'm doing animation. Nothing complicated, but I need to look at the options. How to fit your speeds into normal life? Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 12:41] Or is it like I have everything right from the start and I don’t ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 12:42] The right result is time-consuming Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 12:44] I look at some pole and think that right now, right now, bam, it will turn into a butterfly Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 12:46] Or how to come to terms with the fact that there is no time for life Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 14:53] 94 (95%) Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 21:39] Giant butterfly on pole Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 22:22] 638-673 Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 00:17] Some are going (05 August - ideas - ed.) were on a smaller pole. But it was possible to do Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 00:22] Dima Besedin is tearing it up again. Awesome Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 03:49] Milk from a cow Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 19:10] I'm thinking about the poles that don't exist Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 19:53] Every time a dog barks, I think it's my dog Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 02:00] Uno (05-August - well of course) bomber Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 02:00] ▇▇▇'▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇'▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ 05-August - this trick is already I'm pretty tired of it, let it be for now Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 02:03] Morel mushroom </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-035.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"> Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 02:47] I (05 August - well of course) tell yourself you are in control Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 02:48] So ask yourself who is really in control, you or them Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 03:04] Excessive soldering Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 03:20] Who writes likes this Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 03:22] Butterfly butterfly caterpillar Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 03:22] Draw a caterpillar Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 03:24] Mockingbird was mocking the car alarm <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Zd6Iy4JuGk">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Zd6Iy4JuGk</a> Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 04:47] Cleaned the keyboard on January 12. Put the keyboard back together on April 18. July 29, 8 and 7 are still mixed up. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 08:10] I spent a long time tying up the ties, making animations, drowning in nuances. Then I noticed that I took a different version of the tangled mess.</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-036.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 08:10] Greed is choking me. I like the new one, it's not so artistic, and it went well. But greed is choking me. I don't know what to do. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 08:11] Sweet pain of course. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 08:13] Now I like the first one more again Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:43] Mom used to say that my first word was "fear." Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:44] I always needed some kind of awkwardness, clumsiness. I remember that early. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:44] But I seem to be afraid all the time that something is wrong. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:45] edited Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:45] ▇▇▇▇▇▇ block of text Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:45] I have no time for opinions about light. I have no time either Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 09:46] I remember how I ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇ sat on the window and wanted to retire Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:04] Misha joked about the process. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:06] Nipples Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:07] Well, I kind of use the GTD system, that is, I write everything down. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:25] Bloody bandage Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:27] The Mummy Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 11:41] My heart ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ unborn pillars Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 11:47] With a ruthless hand, clean out all mannerisms. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 11:50] That's when a good movie has a weak ending - it's a shame, so you need to choose good solutions. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 11:51] Or good bad ones. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 11:51] I don't like ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:11] Well, we've finally reached Pepperstein minus Prigov Kabakov. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:26] Some caterpillar of the intonation of the whole thing is maturing inside Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:27] Here's where the parallel comes in: I'd like to write drier, or at least clean and dry it out, and the projects' results also need to be dried and cleaned out, so that they are light in weight. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:28] Well, it's not necessary. The soul lies. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:28] Dry it and it will be like a skeletal leaf. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:31] Like tissue paper. Japanese rice paper. It was cool to print etching on thin rice paper. I had a printing press in Dilijan (August 5 - not Dilijan, I had it at home - ed.), maybe a photo is needed here. It has a large black shiny wheel. Oil-painted black. I don't like and don't want to do anything with my hands, except wash dishes and etching. I want to etch. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:32] When you send Misha the case, I'll let you make a pillar. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:33] I feel very embarrassed to show it. Let it be as it is. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:33] I don't like the tone or something. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:34] I'll tell you what I do: I scatter dots and spin the seed. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:35] Morning glory seeds. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:36] The pillars that never happened are knocking on my heart. I can't stand it. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:36] I can't stand it. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:47] I can feel the form somewhere. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:16] I CAN'T STAND IT Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:16] I can Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:23] I'll spit this out ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ like a ball of wool. And I'll be bigger. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:27] On the one hand, it's good to see, hear, understand and participate, on the other hand, it's not necessary. Look, I've already grown in size. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:27] Diane, remind me about the checkerboard floor. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:28] And I'm also thinking about the pile of poles that someone else didn't make. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:28] A forest of poles. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:28] I'm worried that this will look pretentious on a pole. July 29 - long dash - August 5 - finally we have a joke here. ___ Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:28] Finally, sir, I was already worried. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 15:35] I often imagined the project as a tangled mess, you start and wind it up. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:21] There's still some space up there, you can write something or stick it on lightly (well, just barely). But I don't have the moral strength, among all the things I need or want to do, this doesn't fall into any category. But maybe it's necessary, maybe it will be a step up in the game? Step to the next level. To a better life. There is no internal push. Here are two (three) days to twist a knot that is not visible, there is, but there is no reason for this. What do you think? Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 17:13] Maybe it is not going well because the solution is obvious, but maybe it added context, or rather strengthened it. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 17:13] 100 playblasts Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 17:49] Crank up the Frank Zappa! </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-044.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 21:34] I have been thinking for a long time why there are blockages in the shadows and in the light, after a few hours I noticed that there is a broadcast layer on top. We used to think that broadcast designers were the highest caste, but soon it will be unclear who they will be. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 21:58] I still decided not to render this necessary detail inside, I will give myself a way to retreat. Although it is a pity. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 21:58] It seems no one wants to play with me. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 21:59] The excruciating feeling of being naked. At the same time, of fickle courage. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 23:47] Unabomber was logging his disguises The lady with the log. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 00:31] I can't remember the word. To harass. To drive to exhaustion. Begins with F. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 00:32] TO FINISH Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 00:37] I am enchanted, in love with the card index style. But Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 00:38] I need a scanner Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 01:31] Mom said I am too dependant on the cat Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 01:41] I always wanted to do this meticulously detailed Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 01:53] Oh no. "17. The works of art that appeal to contemporary leftist intellectuals tend to reflect misery, defeat, and despair, or they take on a wild tone, throwing off rational control, as if there was no hope of realizing anything through rational thought, and whatever was thrown away must wallow in some momentary sensation." Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:03] I live cut off from all these books, all these objects and it doesn't matter. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:05] Anyway, the composition either works or doesn't work, and here we need mass for the composition to work, maybe I can sacrifice some precision of detail finally, maybe I could admit that something doesn't matter, especially if it doesn't work out, but I have a small piece of wire covered with plastic. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:08] At this point I lose my opinion about someone's poles. I am imbued with the idea that this is simply personal. But I feel less of a connection. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:11] I also don't know what I think about the fact that most people's progress is jerky and abrupt. In most cases, I didn't foresee where things were going, or I foresaw it incorrectly. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:25] I am slow, in order to have at least a somewhat acceptable pace, I have to lose sleep, life, and to overcome. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 02:27] It seems that in order to maintain focus, I have to reduce rest and sleep. This damages quality and my judgment. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:12] I realized that I am most interested in Stas Khrustalev's case (August 5 - not only) Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:12] Yes, it is possible that there will be text without pictures. That's where I came Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:17] I understand their anxiety, people are scared and have nothing to rely on, they want to take up something old, I understand, I see it in my view of AI, suspicious conservatism, provoked by the inability to adapt, vulnerability, inflexibility, they want to lean on conservatism, I will try to stay with humanism, but this does not cover machines and I do not believe in the three laws. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:19] We were wrong to be afraid that they would take our jobs, we will try to imitate them. Chewing over the chewed. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:24] ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇ Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:25] God, now I'm worried that she's too cheerful. Or sweet. Lord. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:26] There will be 4 threads here, ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇ Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:45] I think that I need to make an index card part. I need to try Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:46] Sometimes you know right away what to do, sometimes you do the opposite. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:48] Stas Khrustalev does everything for a reason Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:49] At first there was a gap between the conceptual and the tactile, now everything is coming to together Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:51] I'm afraid that Stas Khrustalev will beat me :) Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 03:53] I always wanted to remember that I like Rustam's work. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 04:12] You have to make a choice, the choice can be any, why is this important? This is also some kind of sickening pleasure, with ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ nausea. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 04:14] Since this is an object with a large number of points, then everything is connected to everything, and everywhere the shortest path. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 16:30] I'm afraid of a mocking look, the wrong intonation, to sound fake, pompous, conceit Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 16:31] uncomfortably scary Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 16:31] Ted Kozinski is just a white asshole, such a pity Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 17:32] What about the process itself? Rounder, more to the right. Or the verbal turns off, the consciousness turns off. When you have to turn it on, it means everything is bad. (05 August - an unjustified statement - ed.) Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 17:33] It seems to me that it is not turning out as you thought it should be, or vice versa Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 21:39] link Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 21:47] Grizzly man Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 22:03] Christ himself came down and asked me about my life Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 23:31] have this cake and eat it too Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 00:15] I couldn't resist getting carried away with the opportunity to make alt text on a picture, that's where the time goes, among other things (August 5 - didn't work out by the way. I really want to try again) Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 00:45] Hi. ▇, ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇ ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇-▇▇, ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ (▇▇▇▇?) and I'll probably just send you a piece of something. Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 00:45] link Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 17:18] You have to judge by yourself or someone else Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 17:18] When I was dying Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 19:55] I think Tanya will win in the absolute or popular vote Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 21:48] They destroyed 300 F16s Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 22:42] Khazar dictionary Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 22:42] The Manuscript Found in Saragossa Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 22:43] There you had a distribution. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ because I need a pole Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 22:47] About the strange - Thomas Mann Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 23:05] Superiority of form Sshhh, [31-Jul-24 23:05] Plastic hand Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 00:00] Around 1998 we conceived of a hoax diary, even started it. This was some kind of cruel thing $\text{CO}_2lt;br>August 5again $\text{AUGUST 5}_againlt;/p> Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 00:41] Something for children Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 02:20] Back to square 1 Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 17:40] There are a few people who seem to make it work, but I know they have difficulties too. It's good that such people exist. Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 18:10] I was born in Vykhino, I don't know exactly where the maternity hospital is Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 18:14] Now I'm into neo-realism Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 18:15] You go and look at the road Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 18:23] Our page on the world wide web Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 18:36] Note to self Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 19:00] Buy graph paper Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 20:10] Sometimes the same proportions seem narrow, sometimes very square, but the vertical center is always high Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 20:35] wanted to show this Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 20:39] One of my trophies just got blown to pieces. It's for the best: inside I found a crackling machine, a loud-speaking parrot, an interesting tincture, a wet crow's tail, a container of schadenfreude, diamond flour, a light speed limiter, a photo of a mast girl, and 12,345 gold. Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 21:58] I'm upset that someone removed the heart from my pole. And let whoever did it read this in my case and be ashamed. Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 22:22] Tanya's work represents what this table[b] would look like in a universal representation, if it were one Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 22:23] Stas's pole represents a poster design Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 22:24] well, I'm not sad, I'm digesting the narcissistic blow and loss. Normal activity Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:46] Now I feel ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ August 5 - everything is calm in Volgograd (I asked for news - they gave me news) (update - it's not calm in Volgograd) Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:47] I still want to know who it is, I'll have to ask Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:53] I want to be Mr. Mole Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:54] I'm so tired I want to be Mr. Mole. Sits and scurries and there's no need to manifest Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:58] I remember those times when you could afford to be depressed, then those times when you wanted to get depressed, well, to rest or something. Now I don't know what time it is Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 00:58] I'll allow it, but what can you do to me Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:28] I wanted to write that the case is still flowing, I felt I wasn't ready to finish the case, it's still going ▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. While I was opening it to write, I realized that I could let it go. Even so. But I can't let it go. Please say something about this? I Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:29] I was mostly worried about time, that it wasn't there. But lately I've been feeling some kind of calm Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:29] And this feeling of the airport that I miss so much ___ Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 19:22] I need help. Does this look convincing or not? Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 19:30] Procedural, adjusts to thickness, distance and position. But everything is not super smooth of course. A million options that I won't be able to tell apart in ten minutes. I can't stop redoing it. My most common situation. I think there are 3 (4) options - 1. Decide that it's good (normal, enough) and stop. 2. Decide that it's bad and quit altogether. 3. Decide that something specific can and should be improved as much as possible and do it. 4. ?. But I just pick and pick and pick and pick and pick and pick and pick. What do you think about that? >Misha Katz, [27-Jul-24 19:33] ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. > *Misha Katz, [27-Jul-24 19:34] (I really hope (gloatingly) that this is a 30 node setup.)*[^9] Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 19:34] 30 as in many or not enough? .............. Sshhh, [27-Jul-24 19:44] Well, if it looks unconvincing, then it won't save ▇▇▇▇▇▇. I just don't understand it anymore, for quite a long time I thought it was pretty convincing, but I didn't stop redoing it (I thought in my gut that it wasn't, or maybe I'm just such a boring person, I don't know). Now I'm tired, I'm depressed, it seems like everything is terrible. ......... ..... Sshhh, [28-Jul-24 00:28] Dima Besedin is awesome again, even better. Maybe it's what's called talent. Or it's the teacher. ............... Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:55] ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ I would of course (probably) turn it. On the one hand, I enjoy it. On the other hand, I'm sitting here thinking, why would you turn it around? Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:56] The situation could have been more acute. Or it could have been not! Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10: 56] Mostly enjoying it. >*Misha Katz, [29-Jul-24 10:57] (▇▇▇▇! ▇▇▇▇! ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇.)* .............. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:58] Yes, I'm cheating Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 10:58] And after. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:37] Unborn poles are knocking on my heart. I can't stand it! Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 14:38] I want to run and do it. Instead of a case, of course. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:23] There's still a little space up there, you can write something or stick it on lightly (well, just barely). But I don't have the moral strength, among all the things I need or want to do, this doesn't fall into any category. But maybe it's necessary, maybe this will be an upgrade in the game? A step to the next level. To a better life. There's no inner push. Here are two (three) days to tie a knot that's not visible, there is, but there is no way to do this. What do you think? >Misha Katz, [29-Jul-24 16:24] ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇е ▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇е▇▇▇▇▇▇ — ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇... ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇е▇▇▇▇▇▇! ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:30] Well, you could try, right? You can try a lot of things and not let them into the Big Game, the field of options will be replenished. I like the field of options. But there is no push to try, I just don't feel like it. Maybe this is really a guideline and the truth. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:31] I usually do what I feel like doing, but I often perceive it as my mmmm weak character maybe Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:31] The marshmallow experiment, that's all >*Misha Katz, [29-Jul-24 16:31] ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ — ▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇.* Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:32] And really. caught. Sshhh, [29-Jul-24 16:32] Maybe it doesn't work because it's an obvious solution, but maybe it added context, maybe strengthened it, or rather, the opposite. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 13:47] When I put it in Google Docs, it turned out to be 9 pages. By the feel of it, it's about half or a third. Some strange things. But I haven't read back yet Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 14:42] Today I really like Stas Khrustalyov (and a few days) Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 14:44] I started to be afraid that he would beat me up Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 14:44] But I really like them together </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-038.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 14:46] This whole context is some kind of very noticeable pleasure. ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇. Sshhh, [30-Jul-24 14:46] Although no one wanted to play with me except Roma. Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 20:59] when you don't get enough sleep, it's as if all the nuances are eaten up, when you get enough sleep, they even get too much. or vice versa. From the mobile, however, there is nothing at all. I don't know how to relate to this, at this moment there is no relation. And what do you think about this? Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 21:01] and I wanted to show you this Sshhh, [01-Aug-24 21:12] I was visited by some kind of unprecedented indifference today, maybe it's creative growth, I don't know, small differences somehow lost much of their importance. well, not complete indifference, just more ___ Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:29] But I would continue Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:30] ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ loosened his tenacious paws Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:35] Although it wasn't my birthday yesterday, I thought that I haven't been this alive in a long time, probably in 2015. I was happy in different ways Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:38] Tonio Kroeger syndrome. Because you can't afford it. Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:40] My ▇▇▇▇▇▇ was Doctor Faustus, but he needed a magic mountain. It was a mistake Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:40] Well, at this stage of fluffing up, I can tell you anything, you won’t read it Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:40] Even Misha Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:43] But the last stream is pictures. It might not get to him Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:48] I think I don't drink enough water Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:49] I was writing a case, I got tired and dozed off</div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-041.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:50] I'm looking at the entire feed in cats (August 5 - by the way, I need to ask what this means) Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:51] By the way, I like to think about it. Instead of knowing. Or is it all because of laziness? Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:53] Tanya is the embodiment of an artist, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:55] Tanya gave up her blue background. The last bright background. I'll have to put in a red one. Collective effort August 4[^6] </div> ![[shot01-j-3-red (0-00-02-00).jpg]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 01:55] But according to the form they should be in 1920? ....... Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 02:06] Tanya Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 02:06] Stas Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 08:31] Take a swimsuit Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 08:45] Take a swimsuit Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 11:59] Elisabeth Holmes Sshhh, [02-Aug-24 15:13] Lazy Susan Sshhh, [03-Aug-24 17:49] The brownie had a chest Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 12:57] Involuntarily Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 15:00] Sans storm Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 15:00] Change of pants Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 15:07] Everything is so beautiful that art has lost its meaning Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 15:07] Art as mental games is not quite art Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 15:25] Pasolini Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 16:13] Prematurely jumped the shark Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 16:33] FUCKING CARICATURES Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 16:33] You didn't react to ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ like that Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 16:35] ==Rodney dangerfield== Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 16:48] ==Joke found on the rails== Sshhh, [04-Aug -24 17:03] ▇▇▇hes Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 17:03] ABC Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 17:04] Comb Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:22] I had such a book when I was a child (maybe you had such a book too?), I loved it very much. But I remembered it as a book in a foreign language, apparently I couldn't read it yet. A clear sense of a coded message, the pictures are objects, the text talks about them, but I don't know what, and I don't understand what the overall picture is or plot. On the other hand, I remember the content of the text. Probably, later I learned to read. I remember that green marker very well, it was special, </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-095.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">>"Where's Jake, I'm worried, is he dead? I should tweet out that he is dead." > "The fucking Internet stopped working when I said that Jake is dead." Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:23] JD Vance wrote a memoir at 30, and did it serve him well? Sshhh, [04- Aug-24 20:24] Again I fall into this stupid trap, that it is not clear how to discuss something that is not clear. Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:25] Everything happens ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ and step by step, on the other side somewhere there everything has already happened and is done and should not be repeated again. Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:25] My favorite joke - hello friend, do you want me to tell you a story? Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:38] An obsessive feeling that I'm late for something, but I've never had such a dream, I heard it's a common dream. Sshhh, [04-Aug-24 20:39] But I had a recurring dream that I was in a vehicle that wasn't moving, was standing and not moving, then I realized that it wouldn't move, and I would always be in it. And for some reason, it was a pleasant feeling. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 01:23] I was just thinking that painstaking work annoys me, unless it's not clear how to do it Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 01:23] That is, I'm reaching out, but only theoretically Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 01:38] Moonstone Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 01:40] join "Optional words of variable meaning" Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 02:10] I explain this by the desire for simplicity Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 04:58] Again, zettelkasten Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 04:58] Here the expected happens - since everything is connected to everything, it does not seem possible to build any meaningful connections. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 04:59] Just as it did not seem necessary to reveal any thought, or to have one Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:00] However, it was completely in vain that Black Oil was not mentioned Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:01] It feels like walking through a swamp in rubber boots, you have to make an effort to pull your foot out every time, but it's a pleasant elasticity (here you need to add a comment that the situation is fictitious) Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:02] (here you need to add a comment that the situation is fictitious) Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:02] The word spawn has a very characteristic sound. However, I don't have a love for particles, although I do for dots. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:03] I need to record a research interview. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:04] Logbook Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:09] </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-042.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:16] ><s>*"And what is the purpose of dream hunting?" asked Masudi.</s> <s>- The purpose of a dream catcher is to understand that any awakening is only a</s> <s>step in the process of liberation from sleep. He who understands that his day is just someone else's night, that his two eyes are the same as someone else's one, he will strive for the real</s> <s>day, the day that will bring true awakening from his own</s> <s>reality, when everything becomes much more clear than in reality.</s> <s>And then man will finally see that he is one-eyed compared to</s> <s>those who have two eyes, and that he is blind compared to those who have</s> <s>open eyes..."</s>* Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:17] Farewell to farewell in A Date in Samarra Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:21] >"Jerusalem, September 1968. Dorotka, just a few lines: remember once and for all - you work because you do not know how to live. If you knew how to live, you would not work and no science would exist for you. But everyone taught us only how to work, and no one - how to live. And so I don't know how." Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:24] The Bible, of course. Myths, what? Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:28] Anything that wasn't written down THIS SAME SECOND wasn't written down. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:29] >"In any case, reading such a thick book means being alone for a long time. Being without what you need for a long time, because reading with four hands is not yet accepted." Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:30] Screenshots from the countdown 16:44 - what countdown?ah, I remembered Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:30] Draw the numbers Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:31] Don't forget the zip tie renders. Or video Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:32] And then Misha says - I'm too lazy - great. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:32] Here we have a battle between the formal and the informal, apparently. And the empty with the empty. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:33] I write some of the notes on my phone and at 6.33 (not 4) I notice that the letters have no sound. - keyboard. Here's my keyboard - look. I cleaned it up a bit. It's because there are a lot of words, or because I'm rendering, that everything slows down for me. </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-043.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">To take a picture of the keyboard, you need to disconnect the keyboard from the computer, but for it to glow, the keyboard must be connected to the computeryou need to reboot, then, to insert a picture, the keyboard does not necessarily have to be connected to the computer, but it is desirable to write a comment. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:34] >*"Besides, in our time, a person does not have so much solitude at his disposal that he could read books, even dictionaries, without damage"* Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:39] Sudoku Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:42] On the other hand, I will learn this lesson. And now I could only do this here. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:42] >"Intuition - 0" Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:48] I was worried about either the cat or the case, I couldn't sleep, my stomach hurt Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:48] This spasm Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:49] Go print o comment cancel comment again Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:50] I always feel like I'm not doing enough. The count is about 8000 words now. But the words are mostly not mine Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:50] Viscount Sshhh, [06-Aug-24 06:50] This case is getting longer from the end and shorter from the beginning Sshhh, [06-Aug-24 06:50] So it's eating itself? Sshhh, [06-Aug-24 06:55] I've been going to a therapist for ten years and still can't shut up. Okay 9 Sshhh, [06-Aug-24 07:23] Tanya practically copes with a huge number of details on her own. And Lisa perfectly balances her ideal number. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:54] <abbr title="I must have had a dream">Everyone ran the morofon(of course) now they're dragging sticky tape with them, unsticking it towards the finish line and my case is inside </abbr> Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 05:55] Sticky tape Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:16] superscript Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:17] Cell!!! Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:51] I open <in the morning> the file and edit what I've done, a nasty feeling of repetition, I already did the same before going to bed Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:52] These confused 7 and 8 make me stop for a second, maybe it's good Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 16:18] Don't forget about the graphs Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 16:19] I changed the background of this chat to white to make clean screenshots. Disgusting Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 12:25] I have a soft spot for red in general Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 12:26] Although I don't think it's needed in this piece. I thought about it for a while. Although? Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 12:36] Ah. A couple of frames is fine. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 13:05] But we need to understand why/what for. Although I think the answer to the kakanu is very valid. Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 13:06] But I didn't think it was impactful enough (?). This action was aimed at ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 13:08] Although I think, ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 13:08] ▇▇▇▇ё▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ё▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇! Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 13:08] Lenses Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:29] And what is the whole feed in cats? It's like I always come to the last sentence and missed the beginning Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:37] Also, I have a systemic problem with ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇-▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. Although I'm sure that ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. Am I going crazy? Misha Katz, [05-Aug-24 15:45] ........................ Misha Katz, [05-Aug-24 15:46] That's right. (▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇.) ............................ Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 16:02] No, I failed again. Is everything right with ..........., or is it really so that something is wrong with .............? Dear ladies and gentlemen, it doesn't seem possible that I could possibly read the whole thing again. Let alone write it again. So I guess I'm just going to switch right away. Or not Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:51] I open the file <in the morning> and edit what I've done, a disgusting feeling of repetition, I already did the same thing before going to bed Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 15:52] These confused 7 and 8 make me stop for a second, maybe it's good Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 16:18] Don't forget about the graphs! </div> ![[SUMMERCAMP-006-70.png]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;"> Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 16:19] I changed the background of this chat to white to make clean screenshots. Disgusting Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 19:27] Here's another piece. Everything is wrong at all, everything is wrong, everything is not right at all. The most discouraging thing? is that it’s not enough. And everything is wrong. Here we need to redo everything again ▇▇ add it and redo it again, and so on. But still Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 20:41] As a child I was very afraid that God could hear my thoughts Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 20:47] Kyshtymov Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 20: 48] School of Young Naturalists Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 21:00] There was no nail Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:17] This chosen tonality falsely eliminates the need for selection. no way Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:47] >"He was upset that he didn't quite understand what politics was and didn't know where the universe ended. He felt small and weak. When else would he be like that, How are the boys in poetry and rhetoric? They have big voices and big shoes and they're taking trigonometry. That's a long way off. First there's vacation, and then another semester, and then another vacation, and then another semester, and then vacation again. It's like a train going in and out of a tunnel, and it's like the noise you make when you hold your ears in and then open them in a cafeteria." Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:49] >" Now let us try for a moment to imagine, as far as we can, what this abode of the outcasts, created by the justice of an angry man, is like. God for the eternal punishment of sinners. Hell is a narrow, dark, stinking dungeon, the abode of devils and lost souls, engulfed in flames and smoke. God made this dungeon narrow as a punishment for those who did not want to submit to His laws. In earthly prisons the poor prisoner is left, at least freedom of movement, whether within the four walls of a cell or in the gloomy prison yard. It is quite different in hell. There is such a huge crowd of condemned people that the prisoners are squeezed into this terrible dungeon, the thickness of the walls of which reaches four thousand miles, and they are squeezed so strong and so helpless that, as the blessed saint, Saint Anselm, says in his book on similitudes, they cannot even remove the worms that gnaw at their eyes." Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:50] >"But all that I have said about the fury, properties and infinity of this flame is nothing compared to the power inherent in it as an instrument of the divine will, punishing the soul and body. This fire, generated by the wrath of God, does not act by itself, but as an instrument of divine retribution. As the water of baptism cleanses the soul together with the body, so the punishing fire tortures the spirit together with the flesh. Each of the bodily senses is subjected to torment, and the soul suffers along with them. Sight is punished by absolute impenetrable darkness, smell - by the most vile stench, hearing - by howling, groans and curses, taste - by fetid, corpse-like rot, indescribable fetid filth, touch - by red-hot nails and rods, merciless tongues flame. And amidst all these torments of the flesh, the immortal soul in its very nature is subjected to eternal torment by innumerable tongues of flame, kindled in the abyss by the angry majesty of Almighty God and fanned by the wrath of His breath into an ever-furious, ever-increasing flame." Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:50] damn memoirs Sshhh, [05-Aug-24 23:50] my grandmother not only kept a diary 06 August 15:20 </div> ![[016b copy.jpg]] <div style="max-width: 40em; margin: 0 auto;">Liza Benesh, [06-Aug-24 15:48] /Here Liza says that her viewport suddenly turned upside down/</div> --- ##### Footnotes <div>[^1]: spasm [^2]: impossible [^3]: how? [^4]: Calculated on July 30 - July 26 1h45m + July 27 5h14m, clear result in about 3-4 hours, good fast result, plus another 8 hours or more for unclear spinning, very long and in vain by the feeling, as usual [^5]: August 06 15:19 - 27 times. Excellent result! [^6]: Shoved it in on July 29 at 07:24</div> ![[033.jpg]] <div>And then shoved it in some more. [^7]: I just do everything slowly [^8]: And I repeat [^9]: About 54 nodes, probably not optimal</div> --- ##### Also <div style=" background-color: rgba(235, 234, 230, 0.8); padding: 10px; border-radius: 0 px; font-family: monospace; border-left: 0px solid #3498db; margin-bottom: 20px; font-size: 0.8em;"> This case study is not yet complete and is being updated regularly. There are still some missing parts. We encourage you to return for further developments. For more information or to share your own experiences, please connect with us via the following contact links. by: <a href="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies" title="website">pterodactyl.supplies</a>/<a href="https://www.instagram.com/pterodactyl.supplies/" title="Instagram">pterodactyl.supplies</a> Mother Pillar: <a href="https://thepillar.method.education/" title="collective project">The Pillar</a> Mentor: <a href="https://mishkatz.com/" title="website">Misha Katz</a>/<a href="https://www.instagram.com/mish.katz/" title="Instagram">Misha Katz</a> Watch and listen to my Pillar: <a href="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies/thepillar" title="Please proceed and press play">pterodactyl.supplies/thepillar</a></div> Thank you thank you thank you ##### The Pillar crew on Instagram ❤️ [@mish.katz](https://www.instagram.com/mish.katz/) [@ma.moksh](https://www.instagram.com/ma.moksh/) [@_fragileisland_](https://www.instagram.com/_fragileisland_/) [@staskhrustalev](https://www.instagram.com/staskhrustalev/) [@nobodyroo](https://www.instagram.com/nobodyroo/) [@volv_victory](https://www.instagram.com/volv_victory/) [@i_am_benesh](https://www.instagram.com/i_am_benesh/) [@mtlknv](https://www.instagram.com/mtlknv/) [@nananast](https://www.instagram.com/nananast/) [@bres.wk](https://www.instagram.com/bres.wk/) [@lossless.motion](https://www.instagram.com/lossless.motion/) [@rustam_works](https://www.instagram.com/rustam_works/) [@maryna.yanul](https://www.instagram.com/maryna.yanul/) [@rinartio](https://www.instagram.com/rinartio/) [@dima_bsdn](https://www.instagram.com/dima_bsdn/) [@romarugach](https://www.instagram.com/romarugach/) [@theslightlyblack](https://www.instagram.com/theslightlyblack/) [@pterodactyl.supplies](https://www.instagram.com/pterodactyl.supplies/) ###### P.S. On the other hand, I should probably stop rewriting this at some point. ###### P.P.S. Ah, right, the thing. Press play. <a href="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies/thepillar" title="Please proceed and press play">(Or, here is the full experience.)</a> <iframe src="https://www.pterodactyl.supplies/the-pillar-radio-embed" width="100%" height="100%" style="border:none; overflow:hidden;" scrolling="no"></iframe> > Most of the audio is recorded from http://websdr.ewi.utwente.nl:8901/ over the span of several years. > I hope to have my own antenna one day. > You might occasionally hear some other things. >If you're not alone on this page you will be hearing the sound in sync with others.